While we look around at all of the people rushing to spend this holiday with loved ones, those families who are in transition – going through divorces or separations right now, or living with the decisions to do or not to do either of those things – might feel a little less grateful for their particular lot in life this week. No need! Divorce is an important time to count your blessings.
Here are 10 reasons to be grateful if you are divorced or separated during the holidays:
- You never have to eat your mother-in-law’s greasy mashed potatoes again.
- If this is the year you do not have the kids, you have a day to yourself to finally watch the entire series of Breaking Bad in your bathrobe.
- If this is the year you do have the kids, you can start making unconventional choices for the menu – rainbow marshmallows on the sweet potatoes, anyone?
- No one insinuating you look fat by asking, “Is that what you are going to wear?”
- No more worrying that your spouse is going to get drunk and embarrass you in front of your parents.
- No more worrying that if you get drunk and say what is on your mind you’ll hear about how it affected your in-laws.
- Whether it is true in India or not, in America we do not light our daughters-in-law on fire when they ask for a divorce.
- Whether it is true in Iran or not, in America being divorced does not automatically mean you are also homeless, bankrupt, and un-marriageable.
- Even if you just moved into the smallest apartment in town, you have a roof over your head; and you get to choose who does and does not walk in the front door.
- If the whole idea of being divorced during Thanksgiving just turns your stomach – maybe you’ll lose a few pounds and be in “market-ready” condition at all the coming holiday parties! It is never too early to shop for a New Years’ outfit.
If you are not yet divorced or separated, but know in your heart-of-hearts that you need to get out of this relationship, use this holiday season as your internal farewell tour. Catalogue what you do not like, be it the menu, the guests, the smells, the pressure to buy expensive gifts, the complete disregard for the expensive gifts you bought, or anything else, and remind yourself – I will never have to do *this* again.
If you are healthy and safe and making choices for your own life, then you are more fortunate than 90% of the people who live on this planet today. Take a moment to stop and count your blessings. . . Then, please pass the greasy mashed potatoes.
What We Love: I have never actually tried rainbow marshmallows; but I do love the idea of them.
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