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How a Mediated divorce is an Investment in your future

April 19, 2023

How a mediated divorce is an investment in your future

Divorce can be one of the most difficult and emotional experiences a person can go through. The decision to end a marriage can be stressful and overwhelming, especially when children are involved. In traditional divorce, the process can be lengthy and costly, with adversarial legal battles that can leave both parties feeling drained and financially strapped.

However, there is a better way to dissolve a marriage: through mediated divorce.

I have practiced family law for more than 30 years, and I continue to train in the skills required for mediation. Over three decades of divorce, my most satisfied clients are the ones who either mediated their divorce or used mediation to resolve their post-divorce conflicts.

Mediated divorce is an alternative dispute resolution method where both parties work with a neutral third-party mediator to come to an agreement on all aspects of their divorce. This process can be faster, less expensive, and less stressful than traditional divorce, making it an investment in your future.

Here are some reasons why a mediated divorce can be an investment in your future:

1.          Reduced conflict

Notice that I rank this bullet point above the financial reasons. Money may be important, but the animosity and intensity of a litigated divorce are much more damaging than the financial consequences. Mediated divorce is a non-adversarial process that can help reduce conflict between the parties. A mediator acts as a neutral third-party and helps the parties communicate effectively to come to an agreement. This can help avoid the emotional turmoil and stress that come with a litigated divorce. By reducing conflict, both parties can move on with their lives more quickly and with less emotional baggage.

2.          Cost-effective

Traditional divorce can be expensive, with each party paying their own lawyer and incurring additional costs for court fees and other legal expenses. In a mediated divorce, the parties share the cost of the mediator, which can be significantly less than the cost of hiring individual attorneys. Additionally, the process is generally faster, so the parties can save money on legal fees.

3.          Faster process

A mediated divorce can be completed in a fraction of the time it takes to complete a traditional divorce. This is because the parties are working together to come to an agreement, rather than battling it out in court. Mediation sessions can be scheduled at the convenience of the parties, which can help speed up the process even more.

4.          Better for children

Divorce can be especially difficult for children, who may feel caught in the middle of their parents' conflict. Mediated divorce can help reduce the emotional impact on children by providing a less stressful environment for the parties to come to an agreement. Additionally, the parties are encouraged to put the needs of the children first, which can lead to a more cooperative and less contentious relationship going forward.

5.          More control over the outcome

In a traditional divorce, the court ultimately decides the outcome of the case. This can leave both parties feeling dissatisfied with the result. In a mediated divorce, the parties have more control over the outcome because they are the ones coming to an agreement. This can lead to a more satisfactory resolution for both parties.

In conclusion, a mediated divorce can be an investment in your future. It can provide a less stressful, more cost-effective, and faster way to dissolve a marriage. Additionally, it can reduce conflict, be better for children, and give both parties more control over the outcome. If you are considering divorce, talk to a family law attorney about whether mediated divorce is right for you.

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I graduated law school in Portland, Oregon and moved home to Connecticut to practice law with my father. For more than two decades I have worked on hundreds of divorce cases, involving everything from best friends who just could not be married to each other anymore to bitter enemies bent on each others misery and destruction. I believe that my experience in and out of the trenches gives me unique insight into how to help people survive their divorce with the least possible amount of personal/emotional/financial damage. Not everyone needs a divorce, but if you need one, you deserve to Love Your Divorce! Sharon Oberst DeFala
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